I do not feel more pain.
You can do it now ….
You can go now.
You can raise your voice, if you wish.
Can you talk louder? Can you just shut up?
My head hurts from your words. ..
You’re such an evil man…
But I still love you. I love you just the way you are – a proud and wicked.
But I will not… I loved you enough. You never loved me.
Do you know that sometimes you laughing while you sleep?
Annoys me that night.
Annoys me now.
And last night you laughed.
I told you that I want to go. Forever. I was tired of everything.
You had not spoken a word.You turned your head and went to sleep. I heard a „good night“. I knew it was the last time. You did not know that this is our last night.
You turned me back. Silence entered the room. You started to laugh. Quiet, sweet as a little child. Something went through my heart, through my soul … No one deserves to be so happy, not even you. No, no you should not be so happy.
I took your happiness with my cold body. I hugged you. I need you. You were always my drug. I do not want to use any more. . .
But you were happy. You looked so damn happy. I hated that as much as I loved you. I could not turn around, I could not go away from you. You are special to me. In a special way I love you, in some crazy way I want you dead … Some words it is better not to say .. I let love take me far, far away from U. I know you’ll be happy when you wake up. I knew you’d let me go.
I tore the skin. I left it lying beside the bed with my favorite pillow. I went from you to get you back again. Forever. I might forget where you live .. I might lose your phone number. You’ll never call me first. I know that…
These are all lies. LIes that I dare to say out loud. I did not believe in them.
…but it was so nice to pronounce the word.
„You say nothing at all
Well I couldn’t have said it better myself
Tonight the conversation takes the fall
Just love me like love nobody else“